Back to School

"They say that time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself."

-Andy Warhol

Waking up to an alarm, ink on the edges of my palms, it is officially that time of the year: back to school. This year however, I hold on to a new task beyond a student as I now work as a resident assistant for my university! Change has always been something that I have embraced and feared. Yet while I equipped to face the new challenges I imagined I would endure, I found something far more fearful than change, in fact it is quite literally the opposite: stagnation.

It is as if I am back at recess standing on the playground in amazement of every option laid out in front of my very own eyes. For me, it is imperative that everything is visual and in my sight. Whether or not I should label that as a flaw or not, I must have every decision open and available for consideration. And while that may seem a bit excessive, I am starting to believe that maybe that is the beauty of the choices that we face.

Recently I have found myself in a very familiar and elementary situation, which would be conquering the school bully. The thing about a bully is that they are so engulfed in their insecurities to the point of allowing their pride and identity to be immensely affected. Although I am not threatened to hand over my lunch money to someone towering over me, I must remind myself that I cannot allow defeating, cold words or actions get the best of me.

It is like the process of elimination, each encounter presented our way will have several choices. They may not be as crystal clear as A, B, C, D, or all of the above, but when it comes down to it, you will eventually select your answer and discover if it is right or wrong. When it comes down to it, you will be faced with a 50/50 shot of handling a situation and if you believe you drew the wrong answer, do not hesitate reading between the lines of red ink. When it comes down to it, you may find yourself believing you drew the wrong fate, but scratch that mentality and read the red ink that lies between the lines and learn your lesson.

Maybe that really is the beauty of the choices that we face. Like the process of elimination, the "right" answer is always present and in front of you. It is simply just a matter of eliminating the obvious, questioning and exploring the vague, and grasping every reason why.

I may not have recess anymore, but as I am conquering my fears of embracing change, I am also conquering stagnation. However, I must realize that some things will never change. Waking up to an alarm, ink on the edges of my palms, it is officially that time of the year: back to school.